Emotional Ponderings: “Focus”

David Cory, M.A.

Last month I blogged about ‘renewal’ and Spring and doing things differently. This month I feel stuck in the decision to do things differently. This month my focus is my focus ;-) What is my message – other than Emotional Intelligence – what do I want to be known for – with respect to Emotional Intelligence – what do I want to ‘own’ – again, in the area of Emotional Intelligence?

I attended a talk in Calgary by a very inspirational speaker named Richard Robbins who specializes in speaking to realtors. I don’t think he’s any relation to Anthony ;-) Anyway, I went up afterward and we exchanged cards and he remarked that he would be in Vancouver when I was going to be there and so I asked him if he would be interested in getting together. We had a fascinating conversation over dinner and I heard his story of taking his speaking, training, coaching business to amazing heights and how he puts on huge events with  800-2,800 participants. He was very generous with his encouragement, information, and advice and mostly challenged me to think about what it was that I could ‘own.’ What is my message?

I envy Rich. Not because he’s tremendously successful (okay, honestly, well maybe a little ;-), but more because he knows what he ‘owns’ – he owns the ability to help realtors make more money – and it’s easy to attach a dollar figure to that – literally! It’s easy for realtors to see if they ‘invest’ a certain amount of money in Rich’s products and services that they will see a return – Rich can tell you exactly how much – wow, that’s enviable.

What’s my message? Well at least one message is that Emotional Intelligence skills can help people be better people. What’s that worth? How do I attach a dollar figure to that? Now I’m playing around a bit here, because the ability to help managers be better leaders is worth a lot to companies who need to address organizational issues (still attaching a dollar figure is not easy), but the managers themselves – I want them to be better people and they don’t necessarily see a great deal of value in that – at least not the way I’m positioning it at present. If they did, it would be easier to sell EQ assessment, coaching and training – wouldn’t it?

Why isn’t it easier to sell coaching? Why are people not lining up for training to become better people?  Either they are not experiencing enough pain or they don’t see enough gain. Maybe I’m not doing a good enough job of sales (I actually know I’m not and I’m working on it) or maybe people don’t want to change. The latter is true that in the absence of the awareness of the need to change, people don’t change. Maybe it’s a bit of both. What do you think? Please leave a comment – tell me your struggles.


  1. David. You hit the nail on the head. How do you convince someone they need coaching? Better yet, what is the dollar figure do you attach to the results. I am in the process of rebranding my coaching with EQ as the foundation, yet my challenge is exactly what you have introduced here. I guess my first order of business is to find my target market’s pain in order to show them how coaching can help the to gain. Thanks for the insight.

  2. Yes, Herm, I think Catherine Burdett, one of our EQ Coaches, hit the nail on the head when she said to me in a recent conversation that we have to help the client to see that the solution to that pain and the gifts of the gains are “priceless.”

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